The 6-Month Wide Experiment

If you’ve been here a while, you probably know that I had an extremely horrible experience with Amazon (KDP Publishing) at the start of the year. I learned firsthand that tiny issues can in fact cause them to pull your publishing account out from under you, with zero warning. (I wrote a post about it, but the short of the long of it is: BE CAREFUL RUNNING AMAZON ADS IN OTHER COUNTRIES. Literally four cents with AMS ads issues can get your KDP account suspended, and card validation/authorization in other countries can be a NIGHTMARE.)

I had already made the decision to ‘go wide’ before that occurred. I had tried it before with little success. I had also tried it before with limited, quite good success. (My most successful month ever occurred during a wide/permafree month. Apart from that singular month, though, it has basically been a bust. And I want to say that it was not money made OFF Amazon that month. It was money made ON Amazon being the highest.)

The difference this time was that I had gotten a BookBub Featured Deal. I was going to open up a shop. I had a clear internal direction of what was right. And everything did in fact feel it was going right for a change.

THEN ‘my luck’ kicked in. The KDP account suspension occurred one week before the Featured Deal. When the Featured Deal ran, my price on Reave for some reason wasn’t price-matched in Australia to free so it couldn’t run on Amazon there, Kobo was having issues with free books that day (or at least all of mine, and I was told through D2D that it was some sort of issue going on) so NO ONE could get mine there, I got a few bad reviews saying ‘can’t download the book’ (which is actually the only reason I knew there was in fact an issue there).

BookBub Featured Deals are supposed to be THE MOMENT where things start really going. I had a few weeks of excitement before that suspension, and I spent the entire week leading up to what should’ve been a beautiful moment not even knowing if my books would continue to be available, if all I’d worked for over the last decade and a half was going to get taken from me over FOUR CENTS. (I thought it was a little less than a dollar. Turned out? Four cents.) But I got my account back (though the issue wasn’t wholly fixed), after more stress/fear/sadness than I can say. And I was moving forward.

I had a lot of free orders the day the Featured Deal ran, and I rode high for a few hours, but I’ll be honest and admit: Once noonish hit, I just felt... empty.

I did a thing. The thing worked. It was an achievement, yes. A milestone, yes. It was a predictable outcome for a logical tactic, and I felt nothing beyond being glad in a quiet sort of way after that excitement burned out. There was no magic, on the inside. (Though I do want to say that I was/am very happy that people seemed to like the book after reading, from what I could tell by ratings jumps and whatnot.)

When all was said and done, things worked out the way they always work out. I made back what I spent and nothing more + day-to-day running costs for keeping my books up. Not PAYING MYSELF (what a crazy concept). But running costs of website, so on. In all this time, I have only been able to spend approximately $50 on myself from book money. I bought yarn a couple of times that I made myself a blanket with instead of making Christmas hats for people. That’s it. That is the absolute truth of self-publishing. Your books can be #1 in their categories on free lists (not just a day here and there but pretty consistently), be getting thousands of free downloads over the years, and you can make nowhere near enough money to even feed yourself with the series read-through. You can hit the top 100 of all free books in ALL categories, and it can really, ultimately, change nothing.

Earlier in the year, when all this was going on with Amazon, I said definitively, “My books will NEVER be Amazon-exclusive (available in Kindle Unlimited) again.”

I recently went through steps to start getting the paperbacks transferred to IngramSpark, to get them off KDP. That’s how freaking serious I was about it.

Do you want to know what happened?

It took IngramSpark’s customer support ONE MONTH + ONE DAY to get back with me. A MONTH. That is not an exaggeration. That is a real and literal thing.

And I got a big taste of just how garbage other companies can be. I usually 'pull my punches' when speaking publicly about companies, especially ones that I do work with or have worked with, but that is legitimately just GARBAGE.

I don’t care how short-handed you are or any other thing. There is NO EXCUSE for a business to take a month to respond to a support ticket. In that month, I accidentally did a wrong thing, in no way could take the steps needed to get done what I needed to do in the proper way.

But. It taking a month aligned with a real-life thing that put things in perspective to me.

The truth is that, as of a few weeks ago, I am dealing with the sort of health scare that will cause you to really reflect on what you’re spending your time on and the fact that time is not an infinite stretch for anyone on Earth.

I CANNOT justify starting out on such a path with a company that takes a month to respond to things, not even if they are the gatekeepers of and for distribution. No one knows how much time they have, but if this is a worst-case scenario sort of thing? I might not have the time to get done what I need to get done. But even if it’s nothing more than a scare?

WHAT DO I WANT TO SPEND MY TIME ON?

Reformatting books for my shop, getting backmatter updated? Reformatting print versions? Sitting here making myself miserable redoing things I’ve already done seven thousand freaking times?

Nah.

I want to spend time with my family. I want to get new covers done on Carved Legacy (and maybe a few others). And I DO NOT want to be dealing with the customer support of the shop, which was absurd and WAY crazier/worse than I thought it would be even with having BookFunnel for help.

(Can someone please explain to me why the same person would order and download my same book for free upwards of a dozen times, not on the same day like an accident but stretched out over months? I am not trying to be rude, but not being able to find ANY logic in that has been driving me crazy for months. It wasn't even just ONE PERSON who did that. It was MORE THAN ONE PERSON. And that is one of the more innocent, less harmful frustrations/confusions that came with the shop.)

I just want to be happy. I want to have peace.

I want to feel like my time is clean. MAYBE have some of it to write. The ONLY time I felt that way (that I had clean time) was when the books were securely in Kindle Unlimited and I didn’t need to worry about a million other things. They were there, they were done, and I didn’t need to touch a thing unless I updated a cover or something.

So.

‘Never say never’ is a thing. Saying ‘never’ is something I rarely do. I was justified to here, this time. And yet speaking in definites truly is ignorant (quoting from one of my books, one that isn’t out yet). (She might say it’s foolish. Point is the same.)

And I’ll be honest even more with you: The loss of Kindle Unlimited money is SUBSTANTIAL. I never made much, but I made a hell of a lot more than what I’ve made being wide. I have only done it for short stretches before. I did 6 months this time. In that 6 months, the ONLY books I made money on (outside of a few library purchases) were Reave and its series. From the Ashes usually did pretty okay in stretches in KU. ZERO money outside Amazon on it. Zero money on ANY of my books outside Amazon, apart from library purchases and Reave and its series.

It’s not feasible. It’s not sustainable. It is in fact a crazy thing.

I thought about keeping Reave wide, but as okay as parts of me are with ‘permafree’ and ‘free samples’ (believing your free sample is good enough that people will want more)? I am at the point of, “I am so fu**ing tired of telling myself that the only way my books can succeed is to give them away.” Or telling myself, “I can’t even pay to GIVE THEM AWAY.” (With ads.)

The truth I want to live in?

My books are worth more than nothing.

I’m going to have to take the risk of ‘eggs in basket’ with Amazon, even knowing that they can at any moment for any reason crush your basket or your hands holding the basket. If only for my mental, spiritual, and emotional wellbeing. My overall health. I would rather sit and watch occasional page reads (and be happy about people spending the day(s) with my words) than sit here and wonder why in the effing world I can’t even manage giving my books away successfully.

I would rather be happy.

I can’t forget what happened with Amazon.

But my books are worth more than nothing, and (this is a big thing for me) I deserve to feel that my work is worth more than nothing.

So, if you’re a KU reader? Get ready to get them back soon. (Have to wait for them to delist everywhere else before I can re-enroll them.)

If you’re an author? Everyone’s strategy is different. Some people are successful wide. It’s never worked for me. It might work for you. I would only suggest it if you can handle taking the risks of it or find them better risks than being Amazon-exclusive. Or maybe if you have a massive newsletter or social media following. If either of those are the case, you're probably already doing fine and don't need my advice.

If you’re family or a friend? Stuff has been HARD here this year, and I’m going through some stuff.

I think I’m going to leave my shop up and just remove the books as being available, in case anyone wants to ‘donate to the book fund’. I have some new covers to get done, and I do want to get hardcovers done. Hopefully, I’ll be able to get finished with everything I want to get finished.

Wish me luck, y’all.

And if you want to donate to the book fund? Head here: Contribute | C. Miller
Some creators refer to it as 'buying them a coffee' or whatever. For me, it's straight to the book fund. There will someday be a day where I've gotten done what I want/need to and I'll figuratively buy myself a coffee.... Someday.